You know how one can fall in love with the GSS aka Great Singapore Sale.


I bought two tops and a pair of cargo at 100$. It's more than half the price of the original without the GSS. Oh joy I love the sale season. It equates to buying more and more and so much more without the mother making noise because she's also a shopaholic. It's in our blood I think. She was making noise about today's purchases because I didn't bring her along, else she will get an extra 5% discount.


I had street session at Bedok. I cycled to the venue. I'm stringent with fares nowadays. They took turns cycling and such. I wonder why some annoying person have to say things like "it's ok hold tightly to me" and "don't worry I will save you from hell" when we're trying to make things normal. Sigh. Annoying it is.


I also got in few hours on pool. It's fun to play, especially when you're winning Hamzah. You know that good feeling when you win. HAHA. Ok Hamz I'm kidding. I should be more confident playing with Mun and probably pwn her ass again.


Before the com shuts down I'd better end it here.
Dinner is so LATE. I'm hungry like any hungry cow can get. Jien turns 19 today. He owes me a ride.

ofblack&white
9:16 PM

Hello News Of the World. Haha! That came about randomly but ooooh who cares.


Anyway yes I've been rejected by both local universities. The reason why I do not want to tell my parents about it is simple; no fuss. Ok so they do know about it, I mean, they are PARENTS. I have to tell them. The part about disappointing them is secondary, the primary reason being that I cannot stand and would not like to be at the end of a... sympathetic duo. I understand that they have the right to be concern about their daughter pursuing tertiary education. But just the thought of hearing them say "My poor baby" or stuff like that makes me even more guilty, makes me think that I should have done better to avoid all this concern and whatnots.


See, anything in excess, even good, is bad.


So a pw (password) is in place and in bloody good time too. Pw. Three people replied me saying what project work. Sheesh. The things jc does to you.


There are people who read my blog that I wouldn't want. Anna for instance. Because sometimes, there are times that I get mad at them and seething with anger and needing an outlet (aka the blog) but then I have to have second thoughts because the person in question reads and may put two and two together. then the typical girl conflicts and shit and WWIII.

Ok exaggeration here but there's the gist.



Well, at least now I can bitch and rant for all I care and not bother about any hurt feelings or anything. Hurrah for secretive technology.


I'm playing soccer and pool tomorrow. Pool is for morale booster. Yay.

ofblack&white
10:11 PM

You know, there are certain things in Life that I would like to keep.


It's powerful when you get to glimpse a child's purity, the untainted mind and heart. There's no jumping to conclusions, no strings attached mindset, a sincere smile that comes from inside. Sometimes a child's ignorance to the ugly world is so beguiling that I would like Time to crystalise. There's an instance that I chanced upon, a white boy saw two water coolers, one labeled white and the other one coloured. He hurriedly went to the coloured one and happens that his mom noticed. The mom scolded him; then he caught the first view of racism. When the boy grew up, he wished his mom did not stop him, that he should be left to see if water really came in colours.

I don't know, sometimes when I see a little child's eyes, they are so pure. They are so sheltered from all the troubles the world encounter. If only I could remain as it is, to not be revealed to the ugly truth. Maybe all the hatred and evil feelings will go away.
If only we could revert to the time where we can take things at face value.


Well, that's life.


But really, I felt that. When I look out into the inky sky and saw the many stars glistening like Tiffany diamonds and the moon so radiant. I wondered if they have thoughts and emotions like we do. That's a no-brainer obviously, but they reminded me of the children. They shine, sometimes they provided the light in our lives, and they can do so without any worries about reality.

It's like untimely beauty when I look up, as if I'm in awe, yet I was rudely awaken by the hum of the random motorist.




Just a passing thought. Before I went off to sleep. Haha. I've gotten back my 6280, but all the messages and contacts are gone. Maybe it's a sign for a new start. Maybe, just maybe.

ofblack&white
11:00 PM

People HAD to call me when I was attempting to hook my bra. Like how annoying can it be.


Banquet-lunching at PP. It was a day spent at Parkway. And had tuition at MacD with Mun. She's such fun and joy, and we bitched and snapped at each other alot, which is the norm. In desperate need to play pool but Muni had on a school skirt. It had to be today that she decided not to wear shorts, so I bought a pir for her at 3$. Talk about cheapskate please. My pool-skills isn't up there yet but at least I managed to pwn Mun's ass near the start. Eat shit bitch! Haha we tried in vain to make each other laugh.


Another session at AMK and I made a new friend at the void deck, she loves cats. ((:


I'll make a wish for you
And hope it will come true
That life would just be kind
To such a gentle mind.


Just like you (:


AND NAZATUL FADZLIN, MUHAMMAD HAMZAH, STOP TONGUE TWISTING BEFORE I REALLY TIE YOUR TONGUES.

ofblack&white
9:20 PM

TIRED. Haha! I had my whole day out. Anyway I have 30 stalks of roses in my room, God bless what I'm suppose to do with it. Yes they are nice and all but seriously, 30 stalks? Where am I to put them? -.-


So I had tuition till 3 in school. 'Tis tiring but what is not? After that we headed off to Punggol area to play basketball. I was so off-form. Sigh. I can put in a damn thing. It was 6.15 when I stopped and I'm supposed to meet xiao mei at 6.30. Like 'LATE' was screaming into my face. I took fast transport. Sheesh.


It was my first time stepping into United Square or Square2 or Velocity whatever they call it. We had BK and as usual the eternal argument about who's paying. Really. -.- We walked the whole area and it's interesting. I love the Life Is Good brand. It felt good and optimistic because, you know, Life Is Good. Haha! I wanted to climb the rock wall but was dragged away. She's like a MOTHER sometimes. Sigh.


Ameerah showed me that Don'tBeThatGuy thing on her iPod and it's stupid and lame but nice to watch at the same time. Especially that, things you can't do when you're not in a pool.
Dumb, but good!

ofblack&white
9:43 PM

Expectations.

It's more like a fence built around us, to restrict us from whatever that is that we like to do.

Expectations are restrictions, lines drawn on hard stone that we ought not to cross - where we back away, far away from that line to appease our superiors or elders.


How they expect us to be polite, how they expect us to handle situations, how they expect us to even behave and live. Expectations is an excuse for others to control our lives, to live the life they wanted it to be.


Seriously, expectation sucks. Everyone's different, I am different. We are unique individuals and you can't expect us to follow your guide, step-by-step. I am expected to follow a certain protocol, like not swear infront of kids or kill babies, for example. I accept that. But not when you expect me to NOT do sports, to not ride a bike, to clean the house, to not always read books, to enjoy something called STITCHING, to rave on and on about senseless boys.

And give me a look that screamed "YOU'RE WEIRD" when I don't have the same sentiments.


This doesn't go out to my parents but my paternal family in general. They expect me to follow the stereotypical girl they carved so hideously in their minds. Girls aren't that well off with sports, or bikes, or gadgets. So what if I like them? So what if I don't go crazy over fashion as others do? I can't help that can I. Sometimes I hate that feeling that I am under scrutiny, people watching my every step, glare when I can't sit in that girly fashion (I just go for cross-legged), commenting loudly and rudely that "Oh my niece can't even sit properly!".


Maybe they are just jealous. But I'm not going to back down and apologise for whatever anymore. I'm eighteen, legal to think for my own without them drawing the lines and putting up the fences as they wish.


Am I rambling? I think I am. I just don't like to go for paternal family gatherings. Especially NOT in baju kurung. Screw, I'm going to bring The Narrows and my loafers so I can change out of it asap.

ofblack&white
10:55 AM

Oh well. The day didn't start out that great but hey that's okay. Apparently I'm kinda numb and sad but there's other good feelings to feel besides sad anyway. (:


I had lunch at Hougang Mall then headed back to school and all. Chit chat yada yada and that made my day already. Having company and forever putting on that megawatt smile did wonders. I almost believe that I am happy and having the time of my life and not, you know, just not caring.


Until basketball Huda had to ask if I'm okay with it and it crashed back, like whamm into my face. But like any other problems that plague me I brushed it off, and do what I do best: Walk away.

So I wanted to kill Lynn because she nearly said out a name that I don't want others to hear about. And I played the see-saw with Ash. She's lousy at it, you know, that game where we stand on the see-saw and see who fall first. She's hanging for dear life please!


Oh and a blooper haha! I asked Huda to help me get a Michael Connelly. I expect her to come out with A book, note; A BOOK. She came out with four. What the hell right. She's giving Reetha a run for her money.


The match was quite messy I must say. Certain individualist running around the field playing every single position there is save for the goalkeeper. Talking about goalkeepers, Lynn volunteered herself for it since Ameerah sprained her finger. I never could decide if she was being chivalrous or just drop dead stupid because to be a goalkeeper you have to have high morale and a most never-die-attitude, which frankly speaking is not something she exactly have at the moment. But she did well for a first timer. (: Funny to run to the toilets to swap jerseys. I've an eyesore after seeing her. LOL.


But overall, match was okay, and it was never a fair one, since the other team has 2 boys and a MAN, full grown man as a goalkeeper. I know, its a what-the-fuck moment but the girls fight through as strong as they could. Even though they lost, I think they're the real winners. Har, Lucia cramped her leg and oh how she blamed herself, getting angry at herself because of what happened and agonised herself about how she did not play as she was expected, that she could do something more. That is so like Francine. Haha! Lucia looks a bit like Francine anyway.


So Mima was sad. It not about her sadness, that's not the point. She kept it to herself, being quiet and physically different for others to know something is wrong but then refusing to say.
That, strike a very distinct and painful chord inside me. Painfully familiar.


I walked out with Ameerah, we bought bubble tea and I waited for her to go off first. I was very surprised that she loved the books I loved; hey, we said we read all of Dan Brown's in unison. Lol. She read Michael Connelly's and James Patterson's, LOVE chicklits like I do. Hey, I like her already. AND SHE LOVE BUBLE. Haha I was squealing over that. We adore bitchy funny shows. I'm going to lend her Grey's Anatomy 1 after Naz is done with it, and she's lending me The Office, and HEROES. Yesssa. She like cats too. Now I have to ask her if she likes metal.
Which is a long shot haha!


We lie to ourselves because the truth really hurts.

ofblack&white
11:31 PM

Well. It's not that my whole day was bad.


We had to shift tuition venue due to some annoying delinquent wearing slippers and getting chased away. Went Daytona-ing after, and boy can Lynn scream. Like a woman getting raped I tell you. Worse than when she saw a cockroach. Haha! I think I amazed her with my all-time favourite StrikersII. Funny how I don't know her about two months ago and now we're like buddies. She tells me about SUGAR SPICE and EVERYTHING NICE. Ha!


I am still very reluctant to teach H2 but since someone wanted me to be around for security then fine. 50$ is a rip off for her. No tutor charge that low!


It's those days when you really feel sleepy, like lumps of sleepiness hovering around but not able to catch it. We're in the same boat, the few of us. Sigh.


God I sound so blond.



Anyway I'm loving my shoes alot. With much stomping from Lynn, it'll look grubby. Well, the grubby effect is in now is it not? Whatev, really.

I love evergreens. Or upbeat jazz because it makes me want to jump up and dance, which is what I did after I did the laundry. Funny.


I'll stick to my way of thoughts, that to every happening, there's a silver lining. I don't actually care if circumstances got me sad and thinking and emo and what shit or feeling helpless.


Just don't let those I care be in that situation,
especially xiao mei and the crybaby.

ofblack&white
11:41 PM

You should know that I know that you are going to groan and moan but it's my life. I mentioned it before in one of the entries.


Yes, I've gotten new slip-ons, Levi's this time. And they are gorgeous. REALLY. No danger of it being called grandpa-ish. Black denims, only thing it's worn on the feet not legs. Pretty! Plus I've put the shoelaces-that's-meant-for-decorative-purposes on it already. ((:


It was raining boys&girls but otherwise a pleasant day walking around ECP Parkway buying random things like tuna spread cheese spread bread going off to BK karaoke-ing at MiniToons and forget to take the change. Haha!


So what's good? Everything. Except for the fact that I'm broke. I'm broke! All hell break lose. Anyway I forgot which week I'm suppose to have dinner with xiao mei. Although I'm broke she's NEVER going to treat me because I won't allow for it. Lol.


Poor Naz in camp and it's raining like crap just now. I hope you're enjoying it. We heard you squeal in some shop!


You're a part of me I can't let go.

ofblack&white
9:44 PM

Ah, vie.


My room is a mess. It's like World War I and II hit my room (minus all that messy corpses and such). Okay wrong analogy.


I spent my morning till afternoon overworking my dvd player. What seemed like a wait for Muni before tuition starts ends up like Q&A session by the H2 Malay students. Haha quizzing me about how I study and manage to get C for History. God I felt like a fraud. Like I'm so not the model student please - studying just few weeks prior to the big A's and such. That I told them but would they believe me? Of course not. What a question. Sigh.


Mun is SUCH a good student (rolls eyes). The things JC students throw you with. Went Qiji with her, and she being a nice student treated me to my favourite kaya toast. TO ALL MY STUDENTS OUT THERE, TREAT ME. Lol. I'm very pleased that Siok Wen got B for her Math! ANNA please please have tuition.

We saw FAT brown dogs attached to the floor. They are CUTE, apparently she didn't think they are.


It's a lazy day. My appetite's growing as sudden as the tsunami. Gosh I can feel the hydrochloric acid swirling around already.
I'm so getting my shoes tomorrow, and picnic-ing merrily ever after. I feel like singing to the world!


I have Swiss Alps load of work to finish so it's better to start now than procrastinate like anything else.
Procrastination: It not just the river of Egypt.


It's hard for me to say I'm sorry.

ofblack&white
8:42 PM

Lazy Sunday. My day gawp like Moby Dick. I'm so thankful I haven't any tuition today. Can you imagine going out in THIS kind of lazy hazy warm weather?


Lynn was so convinced that Hamzah's my boyfriend, I nearly killed her for thinking it. God the things she could do in the morning amazed me. Haha Lion King. Who ask you to NOT listen to your tutor. You missed your chance to go out with Mr Hot Guy.


We all met at Raffles Starbucks. Hamzah fetched me from school and the silly idiot thought Syahril meant we drop at Raffles Place. Sigh. We waited what seemed like ten years for Naz before heading off to Breeks. Do you know one of the advantages to have best guy friends who earns? They treat you that's what. ((: We argued about the meaning of decadent and referred to the dictionary (aka Ms Huda). Apparently she's going off for a holiday in June. We decided to visit her one of these days.


Oh ya. Syahril was wearing a very nice striped top and all. But he spoilt it with his shorts. SHORTS AND T SHIRT I TELL YOU. With hairy legs showing. His butt was so prominent, I couldn't help but pinched it. He felt violated but who cares. Who asked him to wear that offending item! Haha. Naz is such a blooper (she could give Reetha a run for her money). Like realising there's tartar sauce after she's done with her Fish&Chips. Standing beside the arcade and annoyingly ask "Where's the arcade?!" And when she's asked to put the newpaper inside, she thought we were referring to the Starbucks. ... Thumbs up Naz. Tremendous IQ.


So we went arcading, starbucks-ing (on Hamz for my case (((: ). We walked and bitched and made asses out of ourselves. Which is usual, is it not?


I know I shouldn't spend but I just did. I bought a new pair of shoes (since someone told me the price is reasonable). What more I bought it online. 48$ for a pair of Levi's slip-ons is what I call worth it. After much debating with Hamzah I decided on the very dark denim blue, not olive. Haha no danger of calling it grandpa-ish. I'm collecting it tomorrow or Tuesday. Corr ain't it grand!


Plus tops. I need more tops seriously.
(and here's where the small voice screamed "where the fuck is the money?!")
Sigh.

I think I'm visiting the D&T workshop tomorrow for a massive verbal therapy with the old man. I don't know who I can talk to nowadays without them feeling awkward all over and sir Juffri seems like the best option. Sigh.
Means I have to buy that hungry ghost breakfast from Macs. Screw.

ofblack&white
4:10 PM

Wow. I officially declare myself a directional idiot (not that you people don't know). Sigh.


SO yesterday Sarah and I went off on a quest to find Kelantan Lane. Though she's the one who had been doing all the map-reading. It's such a wonder how you could tell where you are in the map. And know where to move. Fun identifying blocks and streets and roads then became ridiculously proud that we're not lost. LOL.


We went to Lim Ah Boy shop and I've gotten myself a matt-black very very round helmet. Not those fierce-with-weird-ventilation helmets but a very plain black helmet. I like it! It doesn't have visors, just a little peak. Haha! Lunch at Raffles Hospital was nice. The Banquet's there good I tell you, though it's slightly pricey. I've finally bought Nur's pencil case haha. We walked around Watsons, exclaiming how big the Hello Panda packet is or how odd a high-heeled radio is and such. Bugis market have nice watches thus me getting one. White! Rohenie will be in fits because it's almost like hers. Ha.


At the moment the parents doesn't know about the helmet since I dumped it at grandma's. My grandad's been laughing and laughing over my helmet. I wonder why.


So tired. I haven't had much sleep these days. Off to tuition then a nice nice coffee session with the males.



I'm going HK in about two week's time. Just me Aunty Ling and Naz. How fun (:

ofblack&white
9:19 AM

How timely. This happens again.
"I can't sleep" says I. So boredom seeps in (I can't be watching the tube the night away) and here I am.



Just something I need to let out.

How?
Haha for the past don'tknowhowmany months (count them since November till now if you're that curious) I've been stupidly stupidly lying to myself. Saying "oh I've gotten over you since long time already please" may just be a phrase to convince myself. Apparently the heart never wanted to listen. Talk about being hard-hearted. Sigh. It never works. You know, like indelible ink scratched into the skin (think tattoos) that would last the entire lifetime. All the cock and bull about "oh I think I'm falling for someone else" is simply a distraction. AH I'm going mental thinking about how my 'people' targets remained for years on end. Desperately trying to forget and let go but never did. Promptly putting them out of my mind and having them haunt you in the coldest night. It's frustrating yet put a Milo-like warmth in the depth of your own body when you think of them. Why? Many many questions I yearned to ask. It has been two freaking years since whatev and you still crept in my dreams? Like hello, talk about being a stalker! It had been busy and fun months but there's always that unconscious voice in my mind yearning to know whatever you're thinking and doing at the very moment. And things I needed to ask, needed to know. Why sometimes we're like strangers. Why sometimes things aren't what it seems. The vast memories my minute brain could surprisingly hold isn't helping either. Kept replaying like those old black and whites ol' Charlie stars in before his plug was pulled in 77. It disturbs me alot.


I remember a quote from someone I'd very much like to not bother about:
Don't say you don't love someone when you can't let go.

Haha honestly after two freaking-long-going-on-three years, I doubt it'll happen anytime soon.


That's the thing about PMS see, one moment you're happy as a sunflower the next you'll be as droopy as a DYING sunflower.

ofblack&white
2:00 AM

I'm lost for words.
Seriously. How can Melinda Doolittle be OUT of AI is simply beyond me. Bull. Haha Americans probably have different taste than me. Oh well.


So! I went to sent the verily-damaged phone for repair today with Dad. It wasn't under warranty, because the dunnowhatzit is leaking and hence not under warranty. I may have to pay a hundred and fucking twenty dollars that's way out of my budget please. I'm tighter than the poor strained g-strings that Queen Latifah wears (if she does wear them). Sigh. It's scrimp and save time, which is a very tough occupation. We had lunch and he sent me off for riding. Raqeeb was there! Haha he re-registered with the school upon the knowledge that I signed up. It has been a year since he rode anyway. I think Mum threw in the "isn't it such a throw face that my daughter will pass riding faster than you?" nag at God-mode frequency that made him sign up. Honestly, I think I learned my trade of attacking men's ego (aka BALLS) from her. Thumbs up Mum.



It was raining boys&girls and here's where those ridiculously huge bright yellow raincoats come to play for practical. Annoys the hell out of me really.
Besides the point: I CLEARED LESSON 4 *dancing in the most horrible manner*
Halfway there and I'll have circuit revision tomorrow. Aren't it grand ((:


Oh yes. I've finally gotten myself a thumbdrive (more like my dad since he paid for it). Sandisk 1 GB going for 19.90$. Ain't it a steal! I used the pink plastic that's provided as a cover. Haha my dad's pink too! It's really a steal. A 2 GB goes for 29.90$. And so what if it's labeled 'Made In China'? At least it's usable. Get it at Parkway Giant. Haha they should pay me for all the heavy promotions on the blog. LOL.


It's the post menstrual syndrome now. I'm getting sleepy at this hour and I've only had two meals. Apart from that my hormones are raging like mad and mood swings come again. Haha God save me.


Tomorrow I'll be meeting Sarah for helmet-hunting. Yay. And I'm hoping for COFFEE SESSION at a nearby Starbucks. Justhefourofus again (: How lovely. What's with plans to meet the COW Qis soon and an every fortnight dinner with xiao mei and Farn! Haha life couldn't get any better (:


Aside from more money.
And being a better Muslim.
(Sigh)

ofblack&white
9:48 PM

HELLO. Blogger apparently revert to the old nice dashboard and crap. The other one last week looked so freaking dysfunctional.

I had a bad (handphone) day. When I closed the ice container at Cheers, my phone apparently got trapped in between hence the screen fucking died. I'm in a depressed I-can't-communicate-and-I'm-going-to-die mode right now haha. And Zhong reckons its her fault because she didn't help me close the lid to the container. -.- Please, you're as faultless as anyone can be lah. It's just, AAAAHHH frustrating and killing me. When I wanted to call xiao mei I accidently pressed 9881 instead of her 9771. Sheesh. And some unknown person picked up and was seemingly bowled over by my frantic AH-MY-PHONE'S-FUCKING-SCREWED rants. Lol.


The girls lost the match which means goodbye to semi finals. I'm not so worried about them, they have potential, just problematic coach in dire need of changing. Blah. Kat Nurul Star Cas was there. The atmosphere felt familiar once more and again I must stress that I MISS THE OLD TEAM. Though I'm a bit disappointed with a few, but that's okay. All's well that end's well. The few of us were messing around the field shooting penalties and yada yada. Zhong aspires to be a Singaporean tourist with her face plastered onto the bus window. If that doesn't scream IDIOT I don't know what is it. Bubble tea shop and off on our way. Ho well.


It's a good day with friends, not so with phones. ) : I'm so sad about it and I haven't any replacement yet till Friday (LOVES to Ameera for the Sony Ericsson she's lending me). Gosh it's going to be hard getting my tutees contacts.


A year one approached me for H2 math tuition but sadly I can't teach. Hope she'll come down with Lynn aka crow this Saturday so we can see how it goes. ((:


ANYWAY I had dinner with xiao mei and I MISS HER SO (hear that?). Ms Tiny made me spurt out my Shroom burger because she was talking about anuses. Seriously, during dinner?? What a conversational starter my dear.It hit a guy NEXT table. So embarrassing. And we played scissors paper stone before that to see who could pay for dinner. The guy looked at us as if we lost our marbles. Honestly, she's a walking embarrassment! Haha. Not that I minded anyway. So we walked up and down Heartland for the sake of it and walked the way to school (to save bus fares) before I sent her to her bus stop and waved her good riddance (: LOL. Hey xiao mei, can have dinner every fortnight together or even every week! I seriously miss bothering the hell out of you (plus you giving that super super annoying glare and say "what"). Reply me on cbox to that question please. I haven't a phone to message remember?


Sigh. Got to bathe now. Probably going HK for 4 days in few weeks time with the aunt. This is to Naz if she reads it. Can you go?

ofblack&white
9:24 PM

Yess! After a week of figure-bloody eight crank course and slope I'm cleared lesson 3 ((: Cannot describe this elatedness and off to slalom and plank on lesson 4. Halfway there. (:


Anyway I had a dream day yesterday: of doing nothing but lazing around, messaging people nonsensicals, not touching on work, and simply rolling around on bed with good books. Couldn't sleep much though, there's the most annoying cough and slight fever. So I cannot meet Winnie and Loretta for lunch. ) :


I'm still feeling frightfully lazy right now to do anything but oh well holiday ends tomorrow, there's tons of marking to do and delinquents to tutor. Hahah but all the shenanigans of meeting datelines for the marking etc and screaming/torturing delinquents proved to be a jolly affair.


Blah. Sarah's getting her Gilera today. I'm so going to ride on it this Monday night.


I've got the world on a string
I'm sitting on a rainbow

ofblack&white
6:40 PM

Aaaaand the PARENTS ARE BACK. I haven't the faintest idea whatever they are going to do with the very very big box (the type where you fit in a 25 inch flat screen) of chocolates. WHY she didn't use it for more bags I haven't a clue.


Not to sound ungrateful for I am very! Mum bought me a small Coach for outings. I kind of like it, it's loud. Not vulgar loud but in a SCREAMitsCOLOURFUL loud. And a VERY PRETTY brown and white Liz Claiborne. LOVES! Favourite tidbits: HONEY STICKS.

I'm having sorethroat that doesn't seem to want to go away. Grateful for that break from tuition Thursday till Saturday. It's sit-back-and-enjoy-life-baby.

Anyway xiao mei! Dinner dinner next week please! Cheap cheap hor, I know that you know that we're both broke. Ok and set! I so wanna pinch you (just don't bite me back).


My days are sunny, as of the weather too. I will miss the constant sleeping-over at my grandma's. Imagine me in a batik sleeveless nightdress. It hung above my knees so try conjuring a picture of a sexy me (yah go ahead, puke). Me in the kitchen with my pervy aunt mashing potatoes and chopping mushrooms for Shepherd's Pie at night, or me lying on a matress on the floor and the primary sixers on the bunks revising how to solve a problem with squares or how to find the average speed and such at twelve in the night. Sounds loads of fun because it is. Nur poured milo unto my back on Monday night. Literally shivers down the spine please.

Lasagna next week! I love cooking projects.



I say that's life.

and funny as it may seem
some people get their kicks
stomping on your dreams.
But I don't let it, let it get me down
Cause this fine old world keeps spinning 'round.

ofblack&white
11:50 PM

Waking up to find another day
The moon got lost again last night
But now the sun has finally had its say
I guess I
feel alright


But it hurts when I think
When I let it sink in
It's all over me
I'm lying here in the dark
I'm watching you sleep, it hurts a lot
and all I know is
You've got to give me everything
Nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

ofblack&white
11:35 AM

I find blogger update-post page extremely peculiar.


So anyway my grandad had high fever yesterday. I was so scared and wanted to cry. Haha seriously! My grandparents were the ones who brought me up so I love them alot. Scary to see his face as red as tomato and burning like fire. I think he's slightly better now so thank God for that.


I'm having very random dreams and it's not exactly nice. Alot of faces from the past and such.

And my Saturday was fantabulous with the 4j people please. And Jiamin also. Haha seems like photohunt y2k still the favourite game of the class. Alot of them don't change, still as annoying and bothersome as ever haha! And I'm so not short lah. Uno Stacko or whatev it is was a laugh. Khay still have that screamy thing going on. Oh well.


I'm hungry now. Periods doesn't do it any good either. Cramp cramp cramp. Sucks. Haha.


I want to get a Vespa GTS 250. Most of the others are 125cc which equates to it being SLOW. And it's automatic so I don't have to bother to remember to change gear whenever I want to stop.


Sigh. Tuition time now. ((: My delinquents are having midyears this week so it's going to be a hectic one but I'll survive. Looking, so looking forward to Saturday when the four of us can meet and go out.


Parents where ARE you! I need money (and I miss you all too).

ofblack&white
11:28 AM

Oh, how my computer annoys me. It's having a bitch fit, shutting down as it likes. So freaking annoying.


So there. My week is fabulous so far, spent with loved people and doing things I like. I'm not bothered to type it out because the computer will probably shut down before I ended. I made Shepherd's pie with my aunt yesterday. Mash mash the potatoes with milk and pepper and salt and butter. 'Tis fun, this cooking malarkey. Probably be making tuna puffs tomorrow. Parents'll be back next Tuesday or Wednesday I couldn't remember. I'm excited to see whatever they brought back. Mum says she's gotten me a Coach already yeehaw.


There's 4j gathering in an hour's time and I can't wait to see all the quirky characters that made my class. Even Faris Udin Qing Shid are going. Hope Huda and Khay goes too. It has been light years since I've last seen them. AND high tea with MONICA CHENG JIAMIN and it's on her. Haha my day couldn't get any better.



So there's a question I'm so dying to ask everyone.

Moments. I want to have someone whom I can be myself, whom I can be selfish with, jealous with. Someone who accepts me for who I am. Someone who takes my flaws into their stride, who makes me smile when I'm down, who cursed those who made me cry. I want someone I could be comfortable with, I can be open and be perfectly, cruelly honest with.

So what's the definition for someone like that?
Your best friend or your lover?


Puzzling to think for an answer, because the line is so blurred and obscure I couldn't quite place it.

ofblack&white
10:57 AM